What is THE SHADOW?
The shadow is not “bad” as such & hence too its way more complex. The shadow represents the things we hide, ignore, or deny about ourselves. Surprisingly, as I found out it can contain some of our best qualities.
How THE SHADOW work works:
The shift occurs by putting light on the shadow and realizing that the perception of this personality aspect as “bad” is, in itself, the problem. The shadow – or hidden part of our personality – Usually reacts badly when dragged into the light.
THE SHADOW The hidden aspects of our personalities gain power if they can stay in the dark. In environments with too much niceness and fear-based carefulness, the shadow knows it can hide. It will come out sideways, however, and sabotage our healing.
FINDING GOLD IN THE SHADOW
“This thing of darkness I acknowledge mine.” ― William Shakespeare
Our unconscious runs 95% of our lives. “The Shadow” is one of the concepts to explore the unconscious—an important aspect of our psychological development.
If we want to grow, we have to look into the darker parts of ourselves and put some light there. Ever wonder why certain people or situations piss you off excessively? Or why you are deeply enamored by others?
We project our darkness on the things and people we hate. We project our unacknowledged positive attributes on the people we revere. If we reclaim those projections, we reclaim our authentic lives.
The shadow is the part of us we don’t know very well. It gets a bad rap. Many think of it as the “bad” stuff, or the worst side of our personality. The shadow is simply the part of us we hide, repress, and deny.
We learned to repress certain aspects of ourselves. Our families and culture give us cues as to how we should be, and we bury the parts that don’t fit. It is also a type of trauma.
Here is the most misunderstood aspect of the shadow: The buried part of us is often the very best and most genuine aspect of our personality.
To the degree in which the shadow is recognized and integrated,… [it] becomes the center of the individuation quest.” The shadow is a powerful source of growth. By integrating our shadows, we become more authentic and alive.
The shadow is formed by trauma – mild or severe. If an expression or behavior was not encouraged or was shamed by our early caregivers, we may have repressed this way of being.
If we were told or shown that speaking loudly, or being outwardly emotionally expressive, was not acceptable, then we may have repressed our ability to speak up or share feelings.
Sexuality is in the shadow for most of us. Our society implies that our body is bad and to be hidden. If we were exposed to abusive religious ideas about the shamefulness of the body and sexuality, this aspect of life will be at best – troublesome. Suppressed sexuality and body shaming often turn into addiction or self-harm.
The shadow will find its way to the surface – either by healthy integration or in hidden and destructive ways. The repressed emotions live in our bodies and will turn into physical ailments, conflicts, addictions, and other expressions.
The very best way to find your shadow – dark or light – is by examining our projections. We think we don’t resemble the people we project upon. They are the “evil” other. But there is gold in the dark.
Is there a particular politician you loathe? What are the attributes you hate? Of course, you don’t want to be like them. But is there an aspect of their behavior that you would NEVER allow yourself to do?
Is there an artist, musician, or another person you are “wild” about? What are their main attributes? What do you “love” about them? Maybe you have that too? … unexpressed?
We can find gold in our dark projections onto others if we dare to look. Conversely, we may have unclaimed healthy aspects of ourselves in our shadow that we project on the people we put on pedestals.
Another common way the shadow appears is when we act exactly the opposite of the identified evil-doer.
Actively looking at these parts of ourselves is a very powerful process called shadow work; Reclaiming our repressed authenticity.
HOW TO START YOUR SHADOW WORK
Seek support to allow hidden aspects of yourself to come to the surface.
Be profoundly playful. Have fun with your shadow.
Live this life as if it were the only one.